she cried...!

She cried and just cried. She even could not know why she cried but she did all the time. She thought it is better to cry first then to laugh, it is better to be sad first then to be happy, it is better to suffer first then to be free, it is better to be lonely first then to be accompanied and she also felt to die first then to live the life she herself chose which she herself decorated and she herself destroyed. She called herself her own queen, she herself wrote her life, and she herself created her reasons to cry and she made herself lost in vanity. Why? You may ask! Why? Others may ask! Why? Everyone may ask! But she would not answer anyone or anybody. She just keeps quite, walks on her way to vanity, does not even stare at them, the people she hated because of whom she cried just had to cry. She imagined being killed by these people, she fantasized being in heaven, she then again regretted being re born and she again imagined being killed and so on…. She blamed every one for making her life miserable, for making her sweet water disguise into painful tears, for creating despair life, pliable heart and such a weak soul that she always got over whelmed with the simplest thing to the most complex thing. She got over whelmed in sadness, in loneliness, in pain, in suffering, in her tears, in deep thoughts and in her unseen heart. And she started to cry, she just started to cry… she tried to find out the reason for her screams and tears, she thought she blamed the people, she thought she blamed the whole world but that, she only thought.. She then looked in to mirror, deep very very deep. She could see many she in front of her, many many. Eventually she realized it was not them, it was not them at all, it was she herself who made her cry……..